Leno

This is Leno! He’s blind and lives about 4 hours away, yet he still hiked all the way to Nagishot (on his own!!) just to have Abbi and me teach him more about God and the Bible!! He’s come to Nagishot before, and Abbi had gone over Genesis and some other books with him last year. This time we went over Matthew and John! We were able to download an audio bible, so for an entire week, we had him come over and listen to each book one time through completely; and after that we broke up each book into chunks, re-listened to the chapters, and Abbi and I took turns talking through each section.

It was really refreshing to have someone who was so interested and dedicated to learning more about God’s word. Leno actually doesn’t claim to be a Christian, but he definitely has an understanding of what he’s hearing. When we would talk about the parables, he was able to explain them so well and even shared some of his own analogies! He definitely has the knowledge, and I’m praying for God to capture his heart. Most people here claim to be “men of God,” but I am so thankful that Leno is real and honest about where he is on a spiritual level. When we asked him if he is a Christian, he just admits to “some what.” But he’s definitely hungry and eager to learn more!

God, thank you for those who are hungry and thirsty to learn more about you. And thank you for the truth of your Word and daily bread that sustains us always.

Hello America. This is Leno in Nagishot. I come from Lotuba. Now I come here to this Nagishot because of this Lisa and I call it Abbi. And I’ve been in need of the word of God for a little bit. Because of some kind of trial in my life. A long time before, I had my vision. But now I am a little bit blind. And so in this word of God I really found the peace of my heart. And hearing about Jesus with the help of these ladies I got the peace of my heart in really knowing Jesus, Thank you. 

Peter Loturi

“I want you to teach me about Jesus. We don’t know him here.”   - Peter Loturi

There are only a few things I know about Peter:

1) He’s been to Kenya before.

2) He used to be a teacher and can read and understand a little English.

3) He’s too old to leave his compound or walk anywhere.

4) He asked us to teach him about Jesus.

Peter is a Didinga man who lives in Thugura, a neighboring village to Nagishot. Thugura has never really been an easy place to visit since it’s about a 3 mile hike on the side of the mountain to get there and the people aren’t always the most welcoming. But one day we went and stopped at a compound that at least let us sit down and talk to them. And after visiting the same compound a few times, Peter told us he wanted us to teach him about Jesus because he was too old to leave his compound to go to church. This was one of my most favorite redeeming moments!! It was such a difference from Nagishot…there have been so many missionaries in Nagishot, and everyone has heard of God and Jesus and many can probably tell Bible stories to you…yet there is so much apathy. But in the neighboring villages, there are no missionaries and no church. It’s different because the stories are actually new for them. Honestly, sometimes I wonder if they’re just interested because we’re white or because Abbi plays her fiddle. Or maybe they are hoping we’ll bring medicine for them…or maybe they just like looking at the pictures. But it really doesn’t matter, because for some amazing reason God helped us to find Peter and allowed me and Abbi and Lokolong (our Didinga friend who helps us translate!) to return to share with them.

God, thank you for Peter, Olga, Regina, their compound, and your providence!!

View of their compound from the hike over...almost there!

Olga Natiki is quite possibly the oldest women I have ever met! The smoke was getting in our eyes

Peter Loturi and Regina Ito

Peter reading through the story book

People Aren’t Always Beautiful

I said this statement so boldly about a month ago. And again, just the other night. But enter: humble pie, just when you need it. I’ll try my best to walk you through my thoughts the past month or so. Sorry about the crazy mess...

Missionary Envy (noun): The bitter state of feeling like a failure and seeing how wonderful everyone else’s ministry is. Often related to feelings of inadequacy and lack of faith.

I’m really hoping that I’m not the only person in the world who’s had this feeling, especially now that I’ve just blasted this on the Internet. But to be honest, it has been easy to become jealous and discontent with things out here. I was reading about another missionary’s experience where the new language seemed so easy to learn, the people were so beautiful, and missions just seemed so great. And that’s when I became a Bitter Betty. I was so jealous because my experiences haven’t been exactly the same. I mean, what happened to the honeymoon stage???

People often ask what it’s like here, and sometimes it’s difficult for me to fully share about Nagishot, because there are a lot of hard things here. And it’s hard to explain because you’re just plain tired from everything. You’re angry at people who steal from you and the overall lack of justice. (Confession: I chased a kid who stole money from us. Not my proudest moment). Tired of people constantly asking you for things. Hate how wary you become of people and never trusting their motives. Overwhelmed by the stories of murder, suicide, rape, abuse, adultery, theft, arson, abandonment, drunkenness, and lies. And so deeply saddened and burdened by the apathy towards God and the general contentment to live such a depraved and futile life. These are the things that break me. These are the things that make me most frustrated, angry, sad, hurt, and discouraged. These are the things that just recently threw me into a slump of wondering why I’m here and whether or not there’s any hope. The things that cause me to be awake at 1:16 am saying, “God I’m right here, the Didinga are right here…so where are you?” These are the hard things to share because part of me wants to cover the shame, both theirs and my own.  

So this is just one of my many prideful moments where I forget how sinful and wicked and ugly I am too. Jesus didn’t die on the cross because I’m so beautiful and easy to love, yet in the hard moments I fail to remember that I am no less a sinner and am just as much (if not more) in need of a Savior.

My home church is going through the 9Marks book on evangelism and I love this quote from the author:

“When Paul says that we should see people through the eyes of Christ, he means for us to have a gospel view of people. So we see people as beautiful, valuable creatures made in the image of God. Each and every one of us carries God’s mark. That is why Christians believe all people have dignity, worth, and value.

            At the same time, we recognize that every person is fallen, sinful, and separated from God. All people have twisted the image of God into horrible shapes. That is why Christians are not enamored with people either.

            But in a culture of evangelism, most of all we’re mindful of what people can become: new creations in Christ, renewed and restored by the transforming power of God (2 Cor. 5:17). I long to be with Christians who remember that people are image-bearers. I long to be with Christians who remember people’s separation from God. Most of all, I long for a culture that remembers what people can become through the gospel.”

So I must recant my previous statement (whether I’m feeling it or not), and proclaim that people ARE beautiful when you see them in the eyes of Christ.

I promise you I have some other really exciting stories to share about-- great, redeeming moments. The moments that I treasure and can show you a glimpse of Jesus working amongst the Didinga. But those stories are easy to share, and to be fair I thought I needed to post this one first because this is the other side of those good moments.

I’m so thankful for missionary friends and blog posts that are so raw and honest about their experiences. I’ve needed, and clung to, those stories and confessions to feel a sense of normalcy. I wish I could hide my shame and sin, pretending that I’m not drowning in my own self-pity and general lack of humility, love, forgiveness, and faith. But I recently read another blog post that reminded me that the whole story needs to be told. Both good and bad. And so this is my attempt to let you know that whatever the blog post, Facebook update, or Instagram picture, there’s always the good days and the harder days. I’m just praying that no matter the day, I can respond to God in obedience, with thanksgiving and joy.

 

Our friends' home that got burned down. They lost everything they owned, including all the wheat they had just harvested. When we asked what happened, we learned that someone in their family (not sure who) cut the throat of a man, so his wife came and burned their house down.